My Granny, My Blessing

Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, Happy New You and all that good stuff! I can NOT believe it has been almost two months since my last post. There has been so much going on, I'd have to blog all day to tell you what was going on..but, like the older saints used to say at my home church, 'Charge it to my head and not my heart!'

Now, if you go back through my blog, you'll read that my granny has Alzheimer's Disease. Over the past two years, the progression of this disease has been extremely rapid. When we first started noticing little odds and ends, my mother, aunt, uncle and myself, thought nothing of it..until she came to help take care of Jocelyn and didn't know that she had three children (she couldn't remember giving birth to my mom). After that, things got extremely difficult and it seemed almost instantly, she went from stage 1 to stage 3-4. (In case you're not familiar with Alzheimer's Disease, follow this link for more information http://www.alz.org/)

As the disease got worse.. so did my granny's actions, vocabulary and of course, memory. She lost a generation of her family. My mother and I are her sisters and she doesn't remember that some of her siblings have passed away (my granny is the oldest of 12!) Her prognosis bothered me slightly until she know longer knew who I was. I was hurt and sad that the person I admired and loved, did not know that I was Ashley, her granddaughter--whom she raised. I tried to let it go and to not think about it.. I kept telling myself that it was the disease.. and I know it is. But, being forgotten, is.. well.. hurtful. I eventually cried and cried and cried.. and I prayed and prayed and prayed.. that my granny would always be, my granny. That I would not let this disease allow me to forget who she was and is to me.. that I would cherish her just the same as I did when she knew me.. the wisdom and kind heart she showed toward others, stays with me.. regardless of her mind.

Last weekend, I was able to go home and while it was soo good to be with my mother, in laws and sisters from other mothers, it was still hard to see my granny. She didn't know totally who I was and I could see in her eyes, she barely knows who anyone is.. it was disheartening. However, at the end of my trip, the somewhat hardest moment came when we put my granny into the Alzheimer's unit of a nursing home. It has been a difficult week because of so many transitions (me returning to Durham sick, Jocelyn sick, work, Jeremy's school work, the Indiana snowstorm) but my mom goes and visits when she can and reassures me that my granny is all good.. having fun and that this will help her, as the Alzheimer's progresses. I wasn't convinced until I talked to her myself and she sounded so peaceful.. that put me at ease. My mom then told me Granny even has a little circle of friends and they get their hair done! Lol.. I can see my granny getting pampered and loving it.. :)

Just wanted to keep you up-to-date on my granny. The aging process is difficult so please continue to pray for my granny and our family.. Thanks for taking this journey with me too.. this has truly helped me, help my family. :)

Joyful for my Granny,

~Mrs. G

(I lovingly borrowed the saying, my granny, my blessing from my best friends, Tennia. Thanks, T! :)